The following are excerpts from a pdf promoting The Magic of Dialogue: Transforming Conflict into Cooperation a book by Daniel Yankelovich. He is the “public opinion expert” who guided a pivotal public process which resulted in the citizens of San Diego accepting the creation of a regional district government, despite a local cultural adversity to government.
“Dialogue differs from debate, discussion and deliberation. In debate, participants compete to win, defending one’s views against others and searching for conclusions that ratify one’s position. In dialogue, participants collaborate toward a common understanding, exploring common ground and listening to find agreement.
“Dialogue is essential for transforming conflict into cooperation. It requires the absence of coercive influences (all participants must be treated as equals), listening with empathy, and bringing assumptions into the open. He documents how dialogue can achieve results by building trust and understanding.
“Most people have two purposes for dialogue: to strengthen personal relationships and to solve problems. Today, the second purpose is growing in importance: increasingly, we find ourselves facing problems requiring more shared understanding than in the past… Traditional top-down styles of leadership in semi-isolation from others is increasingly out of vogue. It is being replaced by what I have come to think of a “relational leadership†with others, rather than handing down visions, strategies, and plans as if they were commandments from the mountaintop.
“in this diverse and less hierarchical world, decision-makers need to learn to argue less and dialogue more. In this sense, he is giving practical advice to help realize John Gardner’s wisdom that some people just need a “good listening to.â€
http://www.regionalstewardship.org/Documents/Book_MagicofDialogue.pdf